Meeting Oscar

I found Oscar on a working farm somewhere in North Yorkshire. I remember seeing his Mother who was a golden Labrador going totally nuts as I drove up to the farm. She had given birth to seven pups and only one was left. My Oscar.

I had driven up to the farm in a convertible sports car, dressed in designer gear and made up within an inch of my life. As I tottered out of the car in my high heels, I could see the farmer looking at me with a bemused WTactualFlip is she doing here coming for a dog!

As I left with this tiny bundle of fur, in the arms of my sister in the passenger seat, I noticed his Father. He was a black Lab calmly sitting by the side of the farm drive, just peacefully sitting and quietly observing. I remember thinking, I hope this puppy is like his Father.

The farmer voluntarily told me he would happily take the puppy back if I changed my mind! So I deliberately didn’t name him at first. Just in case!

The First Weeks

For two weeks he was the crazy, chaos puppy! Clearly created to torment me and ruin my otherwise perfect life. Apart from the stormy relationship that is.

Never having had an 8 weeks old puppy before, it was overwhelming.

Being woken up at ridiculous times of the night/early hours of the morning to go outside and then not doing anything. At all!

The constant nipping at my ankles meant I had to start wearing my wellies in the house. The endless biting of my hands with his sharp little needle like teeth and then… the incessant chewing of furniture, shoes, clothes, flooring, door frames, window frames, stairs… the list was as endless as his gnawing and chewing!

I had no peace, my life was turned upside down by a cute looking pup, the size of a rabbit and as destructive as a crocodile!

I called the farmer. Reluctantly because I’m not a quitter. I told him I was thinking about bringing him back but I hadn’t quite decided. Yet! The farmer told me not to worry and to call him again when I had made up my mind.

An Angel Appears

I don’t know what Gods were listening but overnight, the crocodile puppy transformed into an absolute angel. It was truly remarkable and within 48 hours I named him. Oscar.

We were inseparable. I worked from home so we were together 24/7. He went everywhere with me and when I did go on holiday, I made sure he stayed with a loving, doggy boarding house where he lived as part of the family. I missed him dreadfully all those times I was away.

Eventually the stormy relationship ended and I never went on holiday again without my beautiful boy. We travelled Europe together. In those days before Brexit. What amazing adventures we had and what incredible countries/places we visited and lived in.

The Rainbow Bridge Calling

Until one day…and it STILL makes me cry… my beautiful boy couldn’t carry on anymore. I knew it was coming but I didn’t want to face it. What was I going to do without my right hand doggy. Nothing could ever replace my Oscar.

He taught me what living is. What it should be about. Living in the moment. Not worrying about what I looked like, what others thought of me, or the negative thoughts about myself! He showed me what unconditional love is. He showed me I am worthy of love. Because of him I discovered my self worth.

I had no idea before Oscar. I had little empathy before Oscar came into my life. I was emotionally impoverished.

So I too transformed. Into a different kind of angel. I became a gentle human being, kind, caring, full of empathy and love for all beings, especially animals.

The spiritual side of me that began in 2000 blossomed with Oscar until the person I used to be was no more. I became a different version of me. Me 2.0.

A Quiet Whisper

Towards the end of life with Oscar, my homeopathic vet suggested I see a friend of hers who was an animal communicator. I went to see her with Oscar and she told me that Oscar didn’t want to leave me but it was his time to go.

She told me he would always be with me, just in a different form. That I would feel him around me and see the little messages he would leave for me so I would know, he had not gone, he just transformed again. This time into a real angel.

She also told me that Oscar said it would be ok to get another puppy, when and if the time was right, and that he would help me choose the name. He said he would do it now whilst he was still physically with me. I told her that I didn’t know if I would ever be ready to get another dog, but she gently reassured me that whatever I decided it was ok with Oscar.

It wasn’t long after that I knew it was time for Oscar to go, so I summoned all the courage I could and asked him to help me choose a name before he left – just in case.

I spent the afternoon and evening trying to communicate with him to see if anything popped up. I remember running through names in my head but nothing resonated with me. Until I was sitting with Oscar by my side, in my living room, and noticed out of the corner of my eye, my vacuum cleaner that I hadn’t yet put away. On the side of it was the perfect name. Henry. It was Henry Hoover.

I burst out laughing and could not stop. Because… when Oscar and I used to go walkies, people would always comment on what a big dog he was. I used to laugh and say had I known I would have called him Henry. After the Hoover!

I Love You My Darling Boy

PS:

Oscar’s sign to me is a white feather. Sometimes one, sometimes a few. When I see his sign I know he’s present with me. As I finished writing this, I realised, Oscar helped me write it. I needed his strength and guidance to write it through all my tears.

How do I know he helped?

Because on the floor by my feet, on the carpet next to my chair, is…a handful of white feathers. From my ‘leaking’ cushions after I took the covers off earlier to wash them. Thank you again my beautiful boy, Oscar.

Always. Together. Forever. XxOxX

Read Oscar’s Poem here.

If you’d like to read more about why Oscar’s love became the heart of time2letgo, you’re very welcome to do so.